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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27573758">I'm Floating Around In Ecstasy</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Last of Us (Video Games)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>80's Music, Alternate Universe - 80's Decade, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, EVERY title of this stoy will be taken from 80's music thank you, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Gay Panic, Homophobia, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Nerd Ellie Williams, No Lesbians Die, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Rape/Non-con, Popular Dina Caradonna, Slow Burn, Useless Lesbians</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 03:49:18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,454</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27573758</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>| 80's decade! | </p><p>Ellie is new to the town, to the college and to the hostel she's now living. With a troubled past and a mind full of messed thoughts, she meets Dina, a lovely pharmacy student. And then all her plans of paying attention to class and not falling in love go down the drain.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dina &amp; Ellie (The Last of Us), Dina &amp; Jesse (The Last Of Us), Dina/Ellie (The Last of Us), Ellie &amp; Jesse (The Last of Us)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>I'm Floating Around In Ecstasy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I wrote this at 4 a.m. because I had a dream and now I can't I'm sorry<br/>this will contain certain angst, but only because it's necessary. I won't make Ellie suffer without reasons, I promise hehe</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Her face was as hard as a stone. She couldn't stay awake all the time like she was doing, too afraid of sleeping and dreaming with </span>
  <em>
    <span>him. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She didn't need his rough hands on her, not anymore, not after everything he had done to her. So she just turned to her side in the bed and crossed her arms over her chest, focusing herself on the classes she would have in secondary school that morning, fighting as hell against the abominable thoughts that would bring her only pain. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But like a black hole, her thoughts always ended up attracting the girl's mind. Soon, she found herself crying until she was breathless, coughing and hating on herself while she tried to make less sounds, still not wanting to wake Joel. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I hate David. I hate myself for what he did to me. And I hate the world for allowing it. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>5 years later; </b>
</p><p>
  <span>It was still 6 a.m., but sunlight was already brightening the whole room, making everything look healthy and beautiful in a way Ellie Williams sometimes forgot could be real. The girl pressed the button of turning on her mixtape, putting her hands inside her jeans pockets right after she got her headphones, eyes still shining as she glanced one last time at her room, happy her plants were alive and her posters and drawings were in the exact same place she left them before. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was nervous, truth be told. She was living in a whole new city, this time no Joel around her to help anytime she needed. No polemical past surrounding her too because of a problematic past, what the girl was relieved for. The only thing she could hope for was to be seen as a person, and not a porcelain doll or a (she didn't like the word, but everybody used it anyway) dyke. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Turning on her black converses, the girl stared at her mirror once again, making sure she was good. Her jeans were fine, her Star Wars black shirt was fine and her converses too, even if they were dirty as fuck. Pondering on herself for a second, Ellie came closer to the mirror, close enough she could see the freckles on her face like a small galaxy over her pale, moon-kissed skin. Ignoring it, she put her hair up in a ponytail, only a lock of it outside the major tuft. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yep, now I'm good to go", the girl muttered as she walked outside the room, finding herself running down the stairs the way she used to do back at Joel's house. She shot a look at the open door that connected the hall of the hostel she was now living in to the small dinner room, only a big table and 8 chairs inside of it. Jesse was sitting in one of them, taking his breakfast with sloppy eyes, still sleepy. Ellie smiled at him, waving to the boy as she walked out the big house, taking her keys off the closet that Marlene left there she could control and know where all the teens and young adults under her ceiling were - if the key was gone, it's owner was outside, if the key was there, it's owner was somewhere in the house. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ellie made her way to college with fast feet, gripping her bag's straps with fierce, brows furrowed as she walked to her new future. Fuck, why was she so nervous, she kept asking herself, ignoring the fact it was normal to be nervous. She didn't want to be anxious about college, and she always made sure to Joel she would be fine without him. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Look at me, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she thought to herself, rolling her eyes as Tears for Fears played on her headphones. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Look at how stupid I look. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Even if suddenly she was ashamed of her style and looks, she didn't turn back and walked away, shoving herself under her brown blanket and crying herself to sleep, afraid of college and people. No, Ellie was way more than feeling ashamed. She was brave and courageous, and she always did what she was meant to do, even if the girl would turn it down when pointed to those facts, so she kept walking to the university. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>By the time she got to her first classroom, people had stared at her so much time Ellie was feeling something was wrong. People didn't know her, right? They didn't know who she was, and what had been done to her. She changed, she had grown, was looking like an adult now, not a 14-years-old kid. But it could be because she was a lesbian too. Did she looked like a lesbian? She was only wearing Star Wars shirts and her skinny blue jeans, she wasn't supposed to look like one. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It's in your face, bitch. Your fucking skull was damaged, and now you're a lesbian</span>
  </em>
  <span>, David's voice suddenly appeared on her mind, however Ellie wasn't little anymore, and she knew how to handle it. Sometimes. Now was one of them, and she turned him off the same moment she did to her headphones, sitting on the last small desk of the last line there was in the room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ellie then took a notebook out of her purple bag and started to draw in it as time passed by, the clock on the left wall ticking it away. Class would be only in 5 minutes, and the room was starting to be filled. She then could hear young adults walking in the halls of university, chatting and greeting themselves after a summer they spent without seeing their friends. She liked the noise, liked to see people interacting and making small talk, it reminded her so badly of her time in the military, with her friend Riley, making her creativity speed do much she could drawn a whole fucking story without even blinking. Her mind was a step of really doing it when someone took her out of her thoughts, saying in a sweet voice her drawing was beautiful. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ellie's heart skipped a beat as she jumped, startled by the sudden person talking to her. The auburn girl put a hand over her chest, finally looking at the girl that was smiling at her. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck, </span>
  </em>
  <span>all was her brain could process as her mind went blank. This girl, was she an angel? Because she looked like a princess, made out of Ellie's sweetest dreams, a fucking fairy. She had thick black eyebrows, a strong nose and lips curled up in a small smile, her raven hair falling to her shoulders and making her bangs look like a crown on her face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Fuck", Ellie murmured, and the girl's eyes changed, her feelings appearing to be shaken. "Oh, no! I mean, not fuck you, fuck me!" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Fuck, what was she saying anyway. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck me? Who says that? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Ellie's face went red, and she felt a little (a lot) awkward as this girl, this gorgeous splendid marvelous girl kept looking at her, now a bigger smile over her face as she laughed at Ellie's desperate eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm Dina, by the way. What is your name?" her voice was so sweet Ellie felt like having a sugar problem. Fuck, her brain was still blacked out, and her feelings so confused she should probably just bang her head against the wall and pass out over then embarrassing herself in front of this girl. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Ellie. Ellie Williams", she answered with small words, not more than necessary as she was trying not to freak the girl out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Can I sit by your side, Ellie?" Dina asked, but before the redhead could even say an animated yes, the raven girl was already sitting there, opening her bag and putting out a lot of notebooks, searching for her pencil case. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ellie tried not to stare, but fuck it was hard. This girl was so lovely and beautiful, Ellie could not mess everything (</span>
  <em>
    <span>as if there is a thing, </span>
  </em>
  <span>her mind kept telling her, but she would not pay attention). So she would glance at Dina's directions sometimes and take a good look at her before she turned herself to the teacher again, trying to take notes and focus on the class. But when class was over and Ellie made herself open her mouth to talk to Dina one more time, the girl was already heading herself to the hall. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Did I mess up?, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Ellie' eyes weighed, and she tried to not pull a cry baby face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She hadn't seen it, which made things way worse than they could have been, but Dina waived at her when she left the room. Ellie was just too focused on not drawing herself on Dina's beauty she hadn't seen.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>kudos and feedback/comments are always welcome! thank you for reading ♡</p></blockquote></div></div>
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